Friday 9 December 2016

Five years

Today Mojo is 5 years old.

Five years since we waited, braced, terrified, hopeful, to meet our baby.

Five years since you waited seven minutes to take your first breath.

Five years since we were wheeled down the corridor of the maternity ward to applause.

Five years since the night I lay awake in a side room at the hospital just staring at you. Trying to get my head around how someone so tiny and vulnerable could be so strong and resilient.

Five years.

Five years of caring, of revolving around you.

Five years of newborn sleeping patterns.

Five years of learning. Medical acronyms, Makaton signing, how to negotiate, how to get the right care, how to say no.

Five years of living on standby for a crisis.

Five years.

Five years of worry. Are we doing this right? Should I be doing more?

Five years of coping, compromise and copious amounts of Calpol

Five years of exhaustion of an unprecedented magnitude (we used to be sleep people, lie in people, duvet day people)

Five years of never, ever, being on time, for anything, ever.

Five years

Five years of explaining, 'it's a bit like Cerebal Palsy'

Five years of interpreting the smallest of noises and hand gestures

Five years of going completely grey (Less silver fox, more completely grey work horse)

Five years of administering physio, manual lifting, adapting.

Five years of carrying you up to bed

Five years

Five years of knowing that not for a single second on even the hardest of days would I have chosen any other path for myself.

Five years of catching your eye across a room or in the rear view mirror and feeling overwhelming gratitude because you're there, meeting my eye, returning my smile.

Five years of pride, of awe, of amazement (how can people be giving me credit for you, you're so much braver, tougher, resilient, determined than me. Than anyone I know).

Five years of the most rewarding 'job' I've ever had

Five years more than we were ever supposed to get.

Five years of love, laughter, joy and living each day purposefully.

Oh Mojo, how we love you. Happy Birthday our spectacular girl, I run out of superlatives to describe you and the effect you have on our lives. Thank you for all the fighting you do, thank you for letting us witness your amazing feats for these past five years.

Here's to the next five. We'll try to keep up.